Who Am I?
I'm 29 & an alcoholic. Which really means, I don't drink. I don't party. I don't stay up late.
Because, I don't fit in that category.. People tend to look at me differently & think that I'm crazy to not drink. Till, I drop the bomb & say, "I'm an alcoholic." that changes everything.
I battled with myself for years, when my friends would try to give me some kind of intervention.. I found it comical.. I could stop drinking, IF I wanted to. But, I didn't want to. Creating new patterns to show that, I wasn't as bad as they thought.
Signs leading to addiction:
drinking to feel "normal"
gaining a higher tolerance
excessive lying about drinking
Fast forward.. I made the choice to go to rehab & a mental health hospital, in the early summer of 2015. I was lucky to not have to stay as long as most.. 2 weeks & 3 days. The detox prior to being checked in, wasn't major which meant that the detox in the facility wasn't going to be that extensive.. Although, the nurses were always on watch with me.. When you try to take your life, the 2 different ways, I had planned to & being highly intoxicated, no one leaves you alone.
Withdrawals from alcohol:
tremors or shakes
drop in dopamine (feel good neurotransmitter) levels
nausea or vomiting
delayed attention & reflexes
I was released & started attending AA (not by choice), even followed the steps recommended (again, not by choice).. What I learned was, I wasn't ready to begin a new life without alcohol. It became a part of, me.. There was no choosing to shift my mindset & become someone that is meant for more.
October 11, 2015.. It changed. I guess, I changed.. I stopped drinking & nothing has been the same since.
Ariel Cullison, creator of Samurai Strength
Follow me on IG: @steelmaceoklahoma & @ariel.cullison